It's clear that there's a level of desperation about her, something intense. She has been so desperate for her to find something to give her a reason, a purpose after being restored to life three times - she had chosen this. When society had failed her, had left her to rot and die in a cage or a pit, she had chosen a path. Rav'ahm was one path and now this dragon would be another, something for her to cling to when the world was too much, left her feeling so pained.
She's breathing hard, her eyes wide and wild as she stares at him. The small, childish part of her is desperate to find some way to repair this rift between them, some way to find herself beside him once more, settled, with Ellis under her fingertips. There's a part of her that longs for the softness of what he had offered her before, but she cannot. She cannot give up her egg.
"Cruel, but I learned to accept them. My mother was taken from me and I did not seek out every man that might have harmed her. I did not kill all men. I could, but I did not. She would not have wanted that for me, would not have wanted me to become as cruel as they did."
Tears in her eyes, hands shaking, trying to rationalise herself. She presses a hand against her stomach, forces herself to breathe, feeling the weight of her past and her future baring down on her. She blinks, gazing up at him, wondering what she ought to do or say but not knowing what to do. She has never been in this position before, never wanted forgiveness as much as she so venomously wished to deny herself the chance.
"The world will always give torment and anger and pain. That is the nature of the world." Removing the dragons did not make such a great change, not as far as she can see. Look how much death there had been already, in a world where there were no dragons. "I will take care of it and I will grow with it. If..." A hiccup in her voice, something tense, something that makes her close her eyes, tears falling. "If it becomes as you say then I will allow it to be killed. But only then."
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She's breathing hard, her eyes wide and wild as she stares at him. The small, childish part of her is desperate to find some way to repair this rift between them, some way to find herself beside him once more, settled, with Ellis under her fingertips. There's a part of her that longs for the softness of what he had offered her before, but she cannot. She cannot give up her egg.
"Cruel, but I learned to accept them. My mother was taken from me and I did not seek out every man that might have harmed her. I did not kill all men. I could, but I did not. She would not have wanted that for me, would not have wanted me to become as cruel as they did."
Tears in her eyes, hands shaking, trying to rationalise herself. She presses a hand against her stomach, forces herself to breathe, feeling the weight of her past and her future baring down on her. She blinks, gazing up at him, wondering what she ought to do or say but not knowing what to do. She has never been in this position before, never wanted forgiveness as much as she so venomously wished to deny herself the chance.
"The world will always give torment and anger and pain. That is the nature of the world." Removing the dragons did not make such a great change, not as far as she can see. Look how much death there had been already, in a world where there were no dragons. "I will take care of it and I will grow with it. If..." A hiccup in her voice, something tense, something that makes her close her eyes, tears falling. "If it becomes as you say then I will allow it to be killed. But only then."